Hindsight is 20/20, too little too late.
So many memories, so many plans.. time to say goodbye, time to shut that book, time to close that door. I wish you the best, I wish you thought it was me still.. I really screwed that one up, didn’t I?
Later days.
“I’m still frustrated from last night
Things happened in half-time, I’m sick of the bends
My panic research was no help
I sink into myself
Afraid of the fall that never ends
I wait, but I’m too tired to play pretend
I’ll suffocate until the end
No time for halfhearted goodbyes
I turn on the spotlight and flee from the scene
Cheap flights from Paris to Bangkok, I thought it was nonstop
Can’t sleep on the KLM again
I haunt the halls of medicine at night
Choking back the urge to fight
Her cat was clawing the floorboards just outside of our door
The panic begins
I searched the whole damn apartment from ceiling to carpet
No sign of the things she used to own
As autumn turns its back on me again
I climb the walls for oxygen
My body aches, it heaves, it shakes
All somersaults through so-called art
And I still don’t know exactly who I am
I never will, amen”